I’m yelling at the top of my lungs…Are You Kidding me? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? The 20 something kid just staring back at me, like I’m the one with two heads. “Hey man, it was just a question” he said. He looked to the ground and made no eye contact.

It wasn’t that his question was wrong or even timed badly, it was the deeper meaning that I got right away after he asked it. Something deeper make me fly off the handel. Something in me made me blow up. Or at least, that how I interpreted it.

The deeper story.

I was working at a place with “bad management.” It seemed that every time an opportunity arose for me to take the next leadership position I was passed over. And then the big ball dropped. I found myself in a position where I was  basically asked not to manage the team that I was on I was asked to make decisions as a team with people 20 years younger than I was. Ouch.  That hurt.  

Why?  I’m a leader.  I’m a good leader.  I want to lead.  But in this situation my feelings about myself didn’t matter. 

So what do you do when expectations aren’t met? What happens internally when you’re left to do what management (or another leader) has dictated and not what you want to do or thought you would be doing at this point in your life?

Well… you begin to make decisions. You make decisions on how you’re going to handle this. How mad you’re going to be about it and who you’re going to tell when you get an opportunity. You make a decision about why this happened and how to avoid it next time. Those decisions aren’t just thoughts, they become set in your subconscious and your subconscious makes a map of how the world works. That becomes your mindset.  Mindset is how you show up in the world. 

“So what. Who cares how I show up in the world. What’s the big deal?”  

Well, what if I told you it means everything. How you show up determines how things happen in your life. How people react to you. If things go well or go really really bad. What if I determined (by how I showed up) that I was getting passed over for promotion because of ME?  Again, ouch. 

Solution?

Clarity. Getting clear on who you are, how you react to things and what you really want out of your company and life. It starts with knowing who you are. How your wired. Then determining what you really want. Setting your mind (mindset and subconscious) on what you are going to do to get there. Then going to work, getting the step done to achieve your goals.

Coaching is the BEST tool to give you as a leader an unfair advantage to go further, faster than you can by yourself. Let’s talk. Call or txt: 615.200.7819